I was shopping in the soup aisle of the grocery store when suddenly a can of minestrone on the top shelf said "Goodbye cruel world!" and plunged to its untimely death right there on the linoleum floor. I stared at it in shock (It wasn't my fault... I'm not even tall enough to reach the top shelf!) but I was prepared to move on. Then I noticed the 3-year-old girl standing a few feet away. She was staring at me and the suicidal can, wide-eyed and tugging on her mother's shirt, beseeching her with cries of "Mommy? Mommy! Loooooook!" I glanced at the mess on the floor then at the child wondering how much of her innocence I would destroy if I kept shopping. She stared back, not yet ready to abandon her attempts to bring her mother's attention to the scene of the crime. Mommy! Mommy!! I closed my eyes and attempted reason... I didn't tell the soup to jump and even if I did, who cares if some rugrat witnessed the event? Her testimony wouldn't stand up in court. MOMMY!! Opening one eye, I peeked at the tot in time to see her drawing in a huge breath that, in a child, can only indicate that something very loud is about to occur. It was the kind of intake of air that is followed by events often described as "bloodcurdling" or "spine-chilling". With that, my decision was made and I scurried off in the direction of good karma and a store clerk.